LOVIN' the CREW

Damn...it's been a while and as I type I can't even believe I'm back at it. I'm so blessed to have people in my corner who knows what my writing means to me. I'm even more blessed to have the inspiration to write. My inspiration runs deep. And that's what this post is dedicated to...all that inspires me to share my words with you.

Seven years ago, I became a mother. I had no idea what that meant. Sara was born and nature kicked in. Sacrifices kicked in. LOVE...it kicked in. Never was I so afraid and courageous, both at the same time! And so three years ago, I felt that again...and again...and again. My crazy ass go and have 3 kids in 3 years. How Drake say it? Back to back...

I had three boys...so God must be playing some kinda game or something because these dudes are beasts in the making! Hunter, Cameron and Noah. Married their dad. Tried to do it the right way. Just how I saw my parents do the shit. And I crashed. Going full speed. Lost it all. My husband, my home, my brand new mini van...all that.

But guess what? God gave me all that back times ten. Why? Because I'm kept. And I'm loving the crew. My kids are the most irritating, neediest, costly beings I've ever encountered. They sweat me from the moment I wake up, during the middle of the night and up until I put all 4 of them to bed. But I couldn't be here without my crew. I wouldn't have the motivation. I wouldn't be as wise. And those child support checks gonna be pretty decent, too! And now that I've let go of the silly embarrassment and shame, I can laugh about it. Hell, it is what it is. Because at the end of the day, I got my kids-the most important part of my world.

With motherhood, everybody on the outside sees what you do for your children. The clothes. The food. The condo. The minivan. The bills. The hair. The doc and dentist appointments. All that comes with providing for yours. But nobody really considers what my crew does for me. Those little faces keep me going. From the first hint of morning breath at 7am requesting breakfast to the late night bedtime stories...my 4 kids create my momentum. They are my momentum. They've brought me the joy that I've spent years seeking in their daddies. They've created a woman out of a scared little girl who had no idea what womanhood was. Everything I do is because I'm lovin the crew. My crew.

I get tired as hell. I never slow down. Even in my sleep I'm thinking of ways to make more money to provide. I'm thinking of things I can do to make my babies smile. I'm thinking of how life is going to be years from now when they don't need me as much. I watch them interact with each other and it's pure amazement. I just stare at them and wonder why on earth God chose me to be their mother...I  mean, not to question God, but it blows my mind that he gave me four lives to love and protect. It's pretty surreal. And I remember watching my OG manage six kids. I remember how she made it all look so effortless. We always had what we needed. We always felt happy. We always ate.

The amount of pain I've felt to just keep them happy is crazy. The struggles I've endured to keep food in the refrigerator and gas in the minivan has been real. Let me tell yall, the struggle is beyond real. And I'm humbled and grateful for what they've helped me achieve. They have no idea the amount of strength they've given me. I think to myself that if they had a clue of what they've brought to my life, that means they understand what it is to love...and that is my ultimate goal...

Thank you God for Sara. For Hunter. For Cameron. For Noah. I had no idea who VERONICA was, until they came around.

To be a mother of four under the age of 30 makes me feel like a walking stereotype. And I slip on my three inch heels everyday and I walk proudly in that shit. Hell, judge me. Whisper about me. Laugh at me. Talk about me. But make sure when you talking, you end the convo saying "BUT HER AND HER KIDS, THEY GOOD THOUGH. Is there a humble way of saying that I am the shit? Because of my crew...I am a BEAST. I'm loving my crew so much. I'm growing as they grow. And for that alone, I'm forever grateful. I wanna leave them everything I have to offer when I leave this earth. That's what I work toward on a daily basis. This blog isn't even a portion of what I want to leave behind. But...it's a good start...

Love,
Vee

Is it Bad That I NEVER Made LOVE?

Good in bed, but bad to him. And that's all some women have to offer.

People may think that since the conception of this blog, I'm like a love guru or some shit like that. Not quite. I've loved. I've hated. I'm no guru. But what I do know is that too many of today's women are closed hearted and cold. And they can honestly say, they have never made love.

Before I continue, let's reassure that yall know what I mean when I say make love. When making love, it takes two. There is an emotional connection happening beyond what's occuring in the physical. Guards down. Hearts open.

With that said, keep in mind that most women may very well be making love to a man, but questioning if he's making love back. Most times, he isn't. And this is not to diss my male readers. I'm sure when many of you are with your women, hittin it, love (among other things) are on your mind. The connection is there. However, so many women have never felt a connection beyond his erection and his condom...if a condom is even involved. But a stronger connection needs to be made or feelings can get played. From this comes trust issues, love issues, a misunderstanding of what love is and how to make it. Issues sometimes beyond repair.

Fucking...yes...that is what most sexual relationships result to. And while yes, some of these relationships bring about a good time, they lack love. And for a woman, the pattern of sex with no love becomes a normal. And the opening of her legs becomes the closing of her heart. And while she can endure someone beating it up, her heart beats for more. But she's never made love because she's never felt love. She can't committ because she's never trusted. Not even herself.

Women are the core of our universe. And I can care less how many of my male readers just got pissed at that line, because it's true. We are the reproducers and we need to know how to love. It's an ill feeling I get when I think of women that cannot love and make love. We are love and we are the teachers of love. We must learn to love beyond any bullshit issues. Our bodies are needed for more than being good in bed. In the literal sense, I mean that.

Love,

Vee

You can Still LOVE your MAN and Be MANLY DAWG

Something for the brothers today. But I'm certain the women out there can relate, too.

So men, who are your homies? Your guys? The ones who you  know will never creep with your girl and have your back if anybody from around the way get outta line? Your dawg who would slap somebody up for you or sit their asses next to you in a cold, dirty jail cell? Those types of friends don't come around too often. But when they do, hold on because they could change your life. Sometimes for the worse. Sometimes for the best.

Listen, I know the high levels of testosterone and the big Beyonce' egos make it hard to show your homies love in a certain type of way. And of course there are certain gestures that you and your dawgs won't display in public... yall give each other daps instead of hugs. But you guys have a mutual love and understanding that only yall need to understand. But understand this, you can still love your man and be manly dawg.

Truth of the matter is, I never understood some guys' friendships with one another. I mean, I know it's not cool to refer to your dawg as your "besty" or "BFF" but I never quite understood the dynamic of the dawg to dawg relationships. But I do know this: When two guys or a group of homies get together, there is some type of crazy, loud, chaotic, beer drinking, cursing barbershop type shit that goes on. Underneath all the discussion about women, baby mommas, sports, cars and whatever else yall discuss, lies an unbreakable bond. Most bonds that started in third grade classrooms, kush cloud sessions, house parties or shit, jail cells.  And I love it.

I love to see the absence of egotistical bull shit and see just pure love among male friends. There is nothing gay or lame about that yall. Regardless of what the media dictates, love among brothers (blood or not) is still love. As long as the friendship between you and your guys are genuine, and you both respect one another's manhood, I love it.

And women, well sometimes we get pissed off due to the fact that he chooses his dawgs over us. But see the bond is hard to explain. And most men won't give it most explanation because...well, hell, men hate to explain shit.

It needs no explanation.

Love,
Vee

VISION of LOVE

Yesterday this blog made 1 year old. Wow. I can't believe how fast time goes and how much I've been able to accomplish with From Vee to You. And it all started as a vision.

I literally, like Myriah Carey in the 90s (back when she made good music) had a vision of love for this blog. I was scared that most people would think I was lame, corny and just plain wack as hell for launching a love  blog. But I said to myself, just do it. I knew the world needed my words. I knew I needed my words. And that is exactly how dreams start. With a vision. A thought. A daring moment to do something a lil bit crazy...but with good purpose.

Last night I stayed up reading my blog posts. Some made me cry, laugh and some made me cringe when I thought about how much of my damn business I had shared with the public. Damn. I shared a lot. But I promised that I would. My own honesty blew my mind. However, the vision would not have been the same if I had not stayed true to what I was set out to do.

But like most visions, I needed people to make me help it happen. I knew that just launching my written work wasn't gonna cut it. It's like every producer out here making beats. Your beats are nothing without a lyricist. And my words are nothing without a reader. So thank you. Seriously. THANK YOU.

I always said when I was younger (especially after hearing Tupac say it) I don't need fame. But I did always have a vision to use my purpose to strike some kind of change. And even though the world is still jacked up and I haven't gotten my hope for world peace, I do think I've encouraged some people to look inside themselves and redefine LOVE...

So with my vision this time last year, I continue to push the same vision. This year, a little more wiser, a little more smarter and I plan to go a lil bit harder. Again, thank you. From the top of my heart, down to the bottom. This vision is nothing without you.

Love,
Vee

Ladies if you LOVE your MAN, Show Him You're the FLYEST

Ladies...how many of us know how to get a man? Better question: How many of us know how to keep one? So in today's world, where any woman or any man can take our man, we gotta know how to keep him. Understand too, that the jewel between your legs isn't enough to keep him. I wanna discuss that internal fly that keeps your man heart... and not just hard.

So over the years of womanhood, I have realized that most real mean are turned on to a woman at her most natural state. Ladies, many of our men are disturbed when your entire face ends up on their white tee. And men, sometimes we want to keep you so bad, that we misconstrude how you determine our sexy. To be fly for your man is to be you. That's the shit.

But do understand there are times to show out for your man and be fly in a way that reminds him why he's still around. Being that lady in public and his sexual weakness in private is what a real man loves. Show him you are the flyest by exclusively being his, catering to his needs and respectfully demanding he caters to yours. Deal with his sports, his homies and bad ass habits. Understand that keeping your man and being fly for him is all about being ok with you and having standards that are the reflection of a Queen. And a King will recognize that. If you embrace your flaws, more than likely he will do the same.

Being fly for your man goes beyond just nails done, hair done, everything did. It's class, your attractiveness; internally and externally. That is nothing like he has ever experienced before because you are his force to be reckoned with. Being fly is respectfully catering to his needs and being G enough to verbalize yours.

Ladies...if you love your man, show him you are the flyest...understand, however, that your flyness is in you. And if he genuinely wants you, he doesn't have to search too far to find it. And gentlemen, if you love your lady, recognize her flyness...

Love,
Vee

I Don't Wanna Be LOVED, I Don't Wanna Be LOVED...I Just Want A QUICKIE

Let's talk about sex...shall we? More specifically, let's discuss casual sex in today's world. Let's discuss hittin and quittin, fuck buddies and bust downs. Excuse my French and I can't say that I'm in France. However, I am in a world where bodies, hearts and souls are handled without care. I'm in a world where we openly admit to sharing our men with other women and in a world where SEX no longer equals LOVE.

Youngsters, log off of From Vee to You. This is adult content only.

Ok, so as adults we won't always mess around with strings attached. And I'm not pointing fingers because I've had my share of stringless situations...and we'll just call them situations. Sometimes, we just want the private parts and that partner to stay private. We want the booty, not the drama. The draws, not the laws.

We want casual sex and for her not to call the next day. Shit, don't even text the next day. We want to be able to call him when our baby daddy act up, put the baby to sleep and "do us." And when it's all said and done, we want to just have the memories and feelings of what that moment brought. And have the ability and freedom to press rewind or repeat at our own leisure. Because after all, it's just sex. It's just pussy. It's just dick. Just a lil head. Right?

Hell naw! Wrong! And we can convince ourselves this if it helps us sleep at night. We can convince our homies and our bffs that casual sex trumps monogamous love anyday. But deep down, outside the bed and unwrapped from the sheets, we all want love from this shit. And a lot of us engage in casual sex relationships, QUICKIES, and straight up hoe activities based on lack of self love.

We've all been there. Don't front. You may have gotten hit from the back and all you've seen after was his back. You do wanna be loved. That's what sex is all about. Or at least it should be. These music videos, song lyrics and famous personas are just entertainment. At the end of the day, those fools want that down ass woman too...not the chick he hits while in tour in her city. At the end of the day, she wants a man to provide and love...beyond the bedroom. And love her deeper than any orgasm.

So look, without a judgmental tone but more of an inspiring one, let's learn what sex really means. The feeling of sex and is not the foundation of sex. The love is. Love you and demand that your body is loved.

Love,
Vee

BROWN Skin, You know I LOVE your BROWN Skin

I'm falling in love with with a white man. And not to say that his skin matters to me...not to say that it doesn't.

And now that I have your attention and put you one step into my business...let's take this a step further. 

The world looks and feels so much different than it did back when racism seemed really alive. But if you ask me, not much has changed. Because when me and my man walk down the street, I wonder what the crazy stares from other people are about. And I get all wrapped up in him and forget all about our skin. But the world won't let us forget...

So because folks are not usually staging boycotts and black folks proudly seat up front on the CTA, don't be fooled. Racism is still underneath the surface of many live souls. Many people can't see it because they are ignorant to what it is. And many people don't believe it because our President is black. And many don't mind because black people are not enslaved, or at least that's what society wants us to feel. But as long as we continue to separate our love for one another based off of where we come from, we will never freely love.

Racism is not just in our history books. And most of those are outdated and full of lies anyway. Racism is right in our faces. But so many people ignore it, so many people confuse it. And unfortunately, some blacks are racist against one another. I don't want to be penalized by rap music because my skin is brown and I'm not a red bone. But I am.

Brown skin...how many of us love our brown skin? How many of us can see past what the world wants us to be and embrace who we are, where we're from? My ancestors fought hard for me to love this skin of mine. And for them, I love who I am. And I want you to do the same.

Racism is ignorance of love. See because love has no color, no skin tone. Love beyond what you see...


Love,
Vee

I LOVE you SO. But Why I LOVE you, I'LL NEVER know

I don't focus too much on haters. Got too much positivity to live for...however; that doesn't mean I'm unaware of the haters. In fact, they're hating asses keep me loving. Ironic, isn't it?

We don't know why. And we can't explain it. But we love our haters...yes, we need our so-called haters to ignite the fuel that burns inside of us; the fuel that keeps us moving. Keeps us hustling. The same fuel that wakes us up and keeps us up. And we know that any hater, of any kind, from anywhere, can either piss us off or pump us up. And here's my top 5 reasons to why we LOVE our HATERS:

5. MOTIVATION: Think about it, whose better to get you motivated than somebody who hates and proclaims that you can't do it? Use their negativity against them by staying motivated and actually doing it.

4. CONVERSATION: We love to be talked about. Good or bad, human nature has taught us to consume attention and this is exactly what a hater does. And the way I look at it, hatin on Vee or not, I'm on your mind! Talk about an easy way to gain street credibility.

3. INTIMIDATION: We won't all admit it, but we like the thought of someone being intimidated by us. And as much as they get on our nerves, we love this about our haters. It does something for our ego.

2. WISDOM: From our haters we learn how to maneuver other personalities and situations. As much as they try to catch us slipping, we regain wisdom for other mishaps caused by haters. Thanks haters!

1. COMPETITION:  We love to compete. We love to be number 1. And our haters make us strive to win...and we should have a goal to win. Remember though, your goals are about you...not your haters. Use their negativity to fuel your fire but convert it into positivity to achieve your goals.

And you will win. You can win. But not if you spend your every moment concerned about your haters and their next move. I get so concerned about my loves out there who constantly claim that everybody is hatin on them...this may just be a figment of some people's imagination. The more attention you give the haters, the easier it is for them to hate. Let them be concerned about your next move. And when they think they know, give them something unexpected. Trust me, they'll hate on that, too.

Stop hatin'...

Love,
Vee

LOVE is a GUN

Man, I'm with Kanye on this one. Killing some wack shit. And excuse my language, but it's truth.

Folks don't fight no more huh? Man I remember memories of Cooley High fights where dudes in tight ass leather jackets and old school hats fought; and be it wrong or right, nobody ended up dead...well, most of the times.

Not anymore. Seems to be that our generations are quick to shoot. Shoot first, ask questions never. Too many of us swear that human souls are bullet proof. And love is a gun.

And guns are these punks fists out here. They killing babies, grandparents...themselves. Pretty soon, there's not going to be  anymore generations to prepare for and raise. They are all due to parish by bullets in the next decade or less. At mass amounts.

Killers most of the times pull that trigger because they're confused. And angry. And mislead. And because of stingy budgets for after school programs. Neighbors who'd rather watch than call the damn police. Haters who can't channel their own insecurities so they take a life to validate their own. Young, lazy ass daddies and momma's too busy "doing them" and not protecting their children. Crooked police....The list goes on. And on. And on.

I blame all of us. Even me.

What are we going to do? We're like the machines and the guns took the form of human life in our streets. They speak for our pain and misunderstandings. And the madness is everywhere. People laying each other down with no respect of life and the life that our Lord gave us. His only begotten son out her getting sprayed by 16s and 38s. How that make you feel? Because it hurts me. Like hell.

So who has a solution? Because I spend my nights thinking about a movement where I can help keep my baby alive out here in these streets. And your babies, too.

So initially, the sole purpose of From Vee to You, was to spread love...my way. Here's my part...I've always been better with words on paper. And of course it's not enough. But it's my start. Because my fear is rising for our babies out here yall. And they're not safe to even go outside and embody their innocence. Hell, neither are we. We have killing with no remorse, depicting a life my ancestors lived hundreds of years ago. And gun shots travel with harsh winds and end lives on petty dealings and mistakes where the bullet wasn't even intended for the young man whose momma won't sleep tonight. And I don't want to be that momma. I don't want it to be my momma. Or yours.

Be serious about what you can do to take your hood back. Because it sickens my stomach to turn on the news and hear about it. I get tired of logging on to Facebook and Twitter "RIPs"... And in Chi City alone, our summer has taken so many souls. I call it trigger happy season.

Wonder what the next season will bring...and just thinking about the possibilities hurt the depths of me. Because as you're reading this, gunfire is ending somebody's future.

Love,
Vee

Marty Mart LOVES the KIDS

They're our tomorrow. And today, that's my biggest fear.

Besides this writing thing, I've always had a heart for children. Even as a child, I was the "momma" of the crew. I've always noticed how they'd flock to me. And as much as I'd front like it drove me crazy, internally, it made me feel good. I knew, like my passion for words, it was a gift from God. One that I had to use.

But it's something about young people today that's not so innocent. And hidden inside of their premature souls are tales of growing up way too fast. Learning the hardships of life, when life should be carefree. Dealing with parental issues while their parents are still battling the lines of adulthood.

And most kids these days miss out on just being a kid. Whatever happened to just going outside as a kid with no worries of losing your life before the street lights came on? No worries of someone taking advantage of your innocence. And no one challenging your youth. I hear so many grown folks whine that if they could do life all over, they would. But Vee, well, I beg to differ. In today's times, I wouldn't want to be a kid again. Hell, it's just as hard as being a damn adult these days.

Most kids I teach and mentor are so angry. And the adults in their world call it bad attitude problems. Or flip ass mouths and disrespectful behavior. But do we, society, have any idea where all this anger comes from? Do we know why so many of our young people are bullies to their peers and why so many of them have hatred that we can't seem to explain?

Well here's why: they're hurting and damn near nobody listens! They're alone and damn near nobody's there.  Instead we blame them, we cuss them, we label them, medicate them, we whoop their asses and turn away. Not many people utilize the patience that is needed to nurture the pain that these kids can't quite articulate themselves. Pain that turns into attention seeking and anger issues. Pain that leads most of them in juvenile detention centers, street gangs and in bed with each other to create more unwanted beings with blurry visions of life and love.

So sick of seeing so many young, frustrated mommas whoop their kids in public for crying or asking for something. News flash: kids cry and ask for shit!! The pains of young parents tryna make dollars out of dimes has become the pains of kids wanting a way out. But let's remember, that kid didn't ask to be brought into a world of chaos. So their peace should be well deserved.
Our kids need us. And not just the ones in your family or on your block. These babies are all of our responsibility. They need our guidance and we can't guide them if we're lost ourselves. They're our future leaders. Our world.

So before I start sounding like an old school MJ record, allow me to make my final point. The love of tomorrow solely depends on our kids. So let's try harder to understand them. Nurture them. Love them.

Love,
Vee