Monday, March 7, 2011
Sunday, March 6, 2011
DANGEROUSLY in LOVE
I think Beyonce had this particular love sounding real good. And being in love at its ultimate where your love and someone's love for you is unconditional, is a beautiful thing. But losing yourself completely in another person is not. And I consider that dangerous, dangerously in love.
We often times listen to the hype and then start seeking for someone to "complete" us. Or go around looking to complete someone else. However, let me be the one to tell you my loves, you were born complete. All of you, just you, is good enough. Perhaps looking for someone to compliment you is more practical. Because trying to have another human being complete you may be dangerous, so dangerous that you get lost in them and forget all about you.
Never in the laws and attractions of love is there not a risk involved. When we fall for that certain someone, we better find their loving. And our worse fear is that at the end, like Drake felt in his video, we're getting played.
So to avoid that, we work hard, most times too hard, to find their love. And sometimes for their love, we get desperate. Desperate enough to give up who we are, our beliefs and morale are thrown out the window and forgotten. And then we fall. Fall dangerously in love...
Our beings become entangled in someone else's and folks who love and know us become lost too, too lost to help direct us. But only our own hearts can be compasses to our own minds. And sometimes even that compass can lead us in the wrong direction.
Love with caution...and not even so much caution even not to get hurt. Hell, that doesn't protect you anyway. But love cautiously enough to know that in order to give love you have to be capable of loving you. And you can't love you if your heart, body, mind and soul are busy "completing" someone else.
Love,
Vee
We often times listen to the hype and then start seeking for someone to "complete" us. Or go around looking to complete someone else. However, let me be the one to tell you my loves, you were born complete. All of you, just you, is good enough. Perhaps looking for someone to compliment you is more practical. Because trying to have another human being complete you may be dangerous, so dangerous that you get lost in them and forget all about you.
Never in the laws and attractions of love is there not a risk involved. When we fall for that certain someone, we better find their loving. And our worse fear is that at the end, like Drake felt in his video, we're getting played.
So to avoid that, we work hard, most times too hard, to find their love. And sometimes for their love, we get desperate. Desperate enough to give up who we are, our beliefs and morale are thrown out the window and forgotten. And then we fall. Fall dangerously in love...
Our beings become entangled in someone else's and folks who love and know us become lost too, too lost to help direct us. But only our own hearts can be compasses to our own minds. And sometimes even that compass can lead us in the wrong direction.
Love with caution...and not even so much caution even not to get hurt. Hell, that doesn't protect you anyway. But love cautiously enough to know that in order to give love you have to be capable of loving you. And you can't love you if your heart, body, mind and soul are busy "completing" someone else.
Love,
Vee
Saturday, March 5, 2011
A Heart is a HOUSE for LOVE
Being around family makes me think of home. And no matter how many places I'll ever live in my lifetime, I really believe there is no place like home.
Like we always hear, it starts at home. And a lot of us are jacked up due to some messed up homes. Shattered fragments of messed up memories where we wish the camera's flash wasn't working.
Society toss around some bogus ass labels that only GREAT kids come from two parent homes and pastor children are most rebellious and most females that are hoes must have never known their daddy...blah, blah, blah.
I say if somebody somewhere cared for you, then you are lucky. And that, my loves, that's home. Can't no place top the place you consider home.
Unfortunately a lot of our hoods are merely cocoons soon to be butterflies with broken wings. No chance to fly from the homes that are just that broken.
Then there's the merging of lives...making babies and adding on to families, becoming part of other families. And if the merge is right, that too is home. But nowadays too many of those particular homes are exhibits of boys forced to be men, crazy baby mommas and defenseless grandparents only wanting what's best. Homes that have become outlines of generations to come.
See home is not a place. It's not so much a location to Mapquest. Home is in your head, state of mind, a feeling that you can sort of touch. It's a house of love. And it can build us up, break us down, but it's home. No place like it, no person like you.
Love,
Vee
Like we always hear, it starts at home. And a lot of us are jacked up due to some messed up homes. Shattered fragments of messed up memories where we wish the camera's flash wasn't working.
Society toss around some bogus ass labels that only GREAT kids come from two parent homes and pastor children are most rebellious and most females that are hoes must have never known their daddy...blah, blah, blah.
I say if somebody somewhere cared for you, then you are lucky. And that, my loves, that's home. Can't no place top the place you consider home.
Unfortunately a lot of our hoods are merely cocoons soon to be butterflies with broken wings. No chance to fly from the homes that are just that broken.
Then there's the merging of lives...making babies and adding on to families, becoming part of other families. And if the merge is right, that too is home. But nowadays too many of those particular homes are exhibits of boys forced to be men, crazy baby mommas and defenseless grandparents only wanting what's best. Homes that have become outlines of generations to come.
See home is not a place. It's not so much a location to Mapquest. Home is in your head, state of mind, a feeling that you can sort of touch. It's a house of love. And it can build us up, break us down, but it's home. No place like it, no person like you.
Love,
Vee
Friday, March 4, 2011
LOVING...just enough for the CITY
Duh, I talk about it like every damn blog piece! I love Chi City and guess what? A day after the birthday of my princess Sara, is the birthday of my city. Yes, today marks the 173rd year of the foundation of Chicago...So happy birthday Chi City!!!
I can't rep nothing I don't know nothing about. In the hoods I've been around, you get beat up for that. And I know this: this city been gangsta long before a lot of people know. So sit down all you dangerous Two Sixes and Moes who false flagging and couldn't even tell me about your 21 bricks. Man I know of stories where liquor and gangstas with the infamous black dob hat ran your streets, my streets and all this damn city. Streets where they took no mercy on fools trying to play them, I can bet this city is home to many dead bodies, souls between the bricks that now make our homes.
Real talk, and maybe it's just Vee, but I be tripping on all the places I could have been born and raised and God decided to drop me off out here in the Chi, out west somewhere off Chicago Avenue. Man, them so rough parts too at the time. Still are.
But I love Chi City for its brutal hustle. Because it's something about us, or at least it should be, that got some resilience out this world. We bounce back, we dodge bullets, we shoot bullets. A lot of us got December hearts from cold summers.
Out East, shout out to all yall. Never venture over there too much, what yall be on? Word is yall saditty, hell me too sometimes. Lets go shopping!!!
Up North, you've turned into a place of wonder. My worries are constant, and it's not just yall street parking that startles me. The love that's being sought somewhere over rainbows where the colors aren't so bright and aint much gold at the end.
South Side: sucka for anything southern. Lover for the ambition in your streets and I'm west side all day but Harold's chicken with extra mild sauce got my heart. Always somebody that way trying to make it, a lot of yall do. But too many of yall not making your eighteenth birthdays.
West Side: My side. So much love for you, so many stories you've given me, many untold. You raised me. Lot of women out west be on some other but you taught me not to be your average.
And like your weather Chi town, my unpredictability makes me. Sometimes too hot to handle, sometimes cold as ice.
And much love for the burbs. On all sides. Something about Chi city burbs that's just as gangsta as its city parts, but it still give folks hope, at least it used to.
Chi city I carry you with me, the harsh winds that I push up against, and the bitter chills that made me strong.
Love,
Vee
I can't rep nothing I don't know nothing about. In the hoods I've been around, you get beat up for that. And I know this: this city been gangsta long before a lot of people know. So sit down all you dangerous Two Sixes and Moes who false flagging and couldn't even tell me about your 21 bricks. Man I know of stories where liquor and gangstas with the infamous black dob hat ran your streets, my streets and all this damn city. Streets where they took no mercy on fools trying to play them, I can bet this city is home to many dead bodies, souls between the bricks that now make our homes.
Real talk, and maybe it's just Vee, but I be tripping on all the places I could have been born and raised and God decided to drop me off out here in the Chi, out west somewhere off Chicago Avenue. Man, them so rough parts too at the time. Still are.
But I love Chi City for its brutal hustle. Because it's something about us, or at least it should be, that got some resilience out this world. We bounce back, we dodge bullets, we shoot bullets. A lot of us got December hearts from cold summers.
Out East, shout out to all yall. Never venture over there too much, what yall be on? Word is yall saditty, hell me too sometimes. Lets go shopping!!!
Up North, you've turned into a place of wonder. My worries are constant, and it's not just yall street parking that startles me. The love that's being sought somewhere over rainbows where the colors aren't so bright and aint much gold at the end.
South Side: sucka for anything southern. Lover for the ambition in your streets and I'm west side all day but Harold's chicken with extra mild sauce got my heart. Always somebody that way trying to make it, a lot of yall do. But too many of yall not making your eighteenth birthdays.
West Side: My side. So much love for you, so many stories you've given me, many untold. You raised me. Lot of women out west be on some other but you taught me not to be your average.
And like your weather Chi town, my unpredictability makes me. Sometimes too hot to handle, sometimes cold as ice.
And much love for the burbs. On all sides. Something about Chi city burbs that's just as gangsta as its city parts, but it still give folks hope, at least it used to.
Chi city I carry you with me, the harsh winds that I push up against, and the bitter chills that made me strong.
Love,
Vee
Thursday, March 3, 2011
I Knew I LOVED you BEFORE I met YOU
In honor of my daughter's birthday today, it wouldn't be right if I didn't dedicate today's love letter to her and what she means to me. This one, my dear love, is for you Sara Sa'Rah Monday...and I'll be sure to read it to you tonight at bedtime. However, allow me to share what you've meant to my life for the last past three years, to the rest of the world. Because this letter is also for every mommy and daddy out here who shares the same love for their babies as I do for my baby.
Happy Birthday!! We've been talking about this particular birthday since maybe your last birthday. And I'm so excited for you and your special day. You have brought me so much Sara, so much that you wouldn't even understand until later. And it hasn't been easy. But I'm sure any mother could second that.
I've been depressed, unsatisfied, downright scared of my next moves...all for you. Sometimes weak, helpless, broke as hell...all for you. I've challenged the manhood of your daddy, denied his love of you and of me, and sometimes hated the life that I brought you into. I wasn't ready, or at least I thought I wasn't...and again, I'm sure every mother could second that.
I still wake up scared, confused, not knowing what the hell to do when you catch fever or throw an unexpected tantrum in the middle of the grocery store. Many days are hard, mainly because they're unpredictable. But most days, my little princess, are irreplacable and just perfect. ALL days that I live, however, are because of you. The hard work, the tenacity, my strength; it all goes to you, Sara.
I still look in the mirror sometimes in a daze. Skinny jeans, size medium t-shirt, and 5 and a half high top Nikes...all 145 pounds, 5 feet and 2 inches of me... and think, man, I'm somebody's momma! And the shock factor still hits me, still makes me nervous. But couldn't make me more happier. And then I flashback to the first day I knew you were growing inside of me, and how scared I was then. And memories of carrying you, loving you before I had even met you. Wanting the best for you before I had even seen your face. Our hearts would beat together then, and they beat together now.
For all you have brought to my life, and for all that I know you will bring, me and Daddy couldn't be happier to take this journey with you baby. So very proud of you. From the flip things you say that makes me either want to crack up laughing or scold you. To the sleepless nights where I have to force you to bed and the nights I just stare at you while in your bed. I love you princess Sara. Happy Birthday my love.
P.S. My special song for Sara is in my video bar to the left! Sara Smile...
Love,
Vee, a very proud MOMMY
Happy Birthday!! We've been talking about this particular birthday since maybe your last birthday. And I'm so excited for you and your special day. You have brought me so much Sara, so much that you wouldn't even understand until later. And it hasn't been easy. But I'm sure any mother could second that.
I've been depressed, unsatisfied, downright scared of my next moves...all for you. Sometimes weak, helpless, broke as hell...all for you. I've challenged the manhood of your daddy, denied his love of you and of me, and sometimes hated the life that I brought you into. I wasn't ready, or at least I thought I wasn't...and again, I'm sure every mother could second that.
I still wake up scared, confused, not knowing what the hell to do when you catch fever or throw an unexpected tantrum in the middle of the grocery store. Many days are hard, mainly because they're unpredictable. But most days, my little princess, are irreplacable and just perfect. ALL days that I live, however, are because of you. The hard work, the tenacity, my strength; it all goes to you, Sara.
I still look in the mirror sometimes in a daze. Skinny jeans, size medium t-shirt, and 5 and a half high top Nikes...all 145 pounds, 5 feet and 2 inches of me... and think, man, I'm somebody's momma! And the shock factor still hits me, still makes me nervous. But couldn't make me more happier. And then I flashback to the first day I knew you were growing inside of me, and how scared I was then. And memories of carrying you, loving you before I had even met you. Wanting the best for you before I had even seen your face. Our hearts would beat together then, and they beat together now.
For all you have brought to my life, and for all that I know you will bring, me and Daddy couldn't be happier to take this journey with you baby. So very proud of you. From the flip things you say that makes me either want to crack up laughing or scold you. To the sleepless nights where I have to force you to bed and the nights I just stare at you while in your bed. I love you princess Sara. Happy Birthday my love.
P.S. My special song for Sara is in my video bar to the left! Sara Smile...
Love,
Vee, a very proud MOMMY
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
In LOVE with a STRIPPER
One of the most taboo things in our culture, I believe, is porn and actually enjoying porn. I'm talking movies, websites, strip clubs...yes, all that. I believe that many of us are embarrassed to admit that to some extent, strip clubs, five dollar flicks from our local bootleg man and porn sites on the web that may cause viruses on our computers, are things that we sometimes enjoy.
Allow me to get grown and real here; whether your pornographic journey is alone or with your partner of choice, it can become an embarrassing moment. And in today's love letter, I want to discuss what makes those moments taboo; what is it that makes the idea of masturbation or viewing porn with your significant other on your living room flat screen seem...well, embarrassing? And why are we sometimes so ashamed about these things?
Let's first discuss sex in our culture. It's possibly so taboo because of the way that it is thrown around, similar to the way that some of us throw ourselves around. And a lot of us do this, disregarding the fact that our bodies and the souls that we offer to others are to be treated with care. So this my loves, this is where the embarrassment and shame comes from. The shame then gives us reason to lie about working late and end up at the titi bar. Or compare our women to those on the porn movies that we watch when she's not around, or hell, maybe even when she is around. The shame is not from what we're doing, but how we're doing it.
I realize this topic may be very heavy for some of you, and to all of my underage readers, keep reading because I'd rather you hear the truth about this rather than the ignorant ramblings of a friend or in the lyrics of a song that your momma's wouldn't approve you listening to. We fall in love with strippers, we become addicted to porn and we hide these things of fear of facing the one truth that we're all afraid to admit...it's not so difficult to face others about this, but many of us have a problem with facing ourselves.
Some are making it rain at strip clubs when they're babies are home hungry and bills are unpaid. And some are falling in love with the woman on the pole, while the woman at home in bed is waiting for you to come home. But it's not the acts that I'm speaking of that we become addicted to. We become addicted to the feelings that it gives us. And those feelings are supressed, we stick them somewhere deep down in our pockets next to the dollars that we plan to throw at the nude bodies that themselves, have mouths to feed or perhaps tuition to pay.
Don't allow desired feelings of the flesh define or validate what you mean to you. And damn sure don't allow any movie, club, site, whatever, to make you lose you and the people you love.
Enjoy your bodies and the bodies of those worthy of you when the time and purpose is right. This way, the adventures in your bedroom (with or without that special someone) can be comfortably pleasurable, not shamefully embarrassing.
Love,
Vee
Allow me to get grown and real here; whether your pornographic journey is alone or with your partner of choice, it can become an embarrassing moment. And in today's love letter, I want to discuss what makes those moments taboo; what is it that makes the idea of masturbation or viewing porn with your significant other on your living room flat screen seem...well, embarrassing? And why are we sometimes so ashamed about these things?
Let's first discuss sex in our culture. It's possibly so taboo because of the way that it is thrown around, similar to the way that some of us throw ourselves around. And a lot of us do this, disregarding the fact that our bodies and the souls that we offer to others are to be treated with care. So this my loves, this is where the embarrassment and shame comes from. The shame then gives us reason to lie about working late and end up at the titi bar. Or compare our women to those on the porn movies that we watch when she's not around, or hell, maybe even when she is around. The shame is not from what we're doing, but how we're doing it.
I realize this topic may be very heavy for some of you, and to all of my underage readers, keep reading because I'd rather you hear the truth about this rather than the ignorant ramblings of a friend or in the lyrics of a song that your momma's wouldn't approve you listening to. We fall in love with strippers, we become addicted to porn and we hide these things of fear of facing the one truth that we're all afraid to admit...it's not so difficult to face others about this, but many of us have a problem with facing ourselves.
Some are making it rain at strip clubs when they're babies are home hungry and bills are unpaid. And some are falling in love with the woman on the pole, while the woman at home in bed is waiting for you to come home. But it's not the acts that I'm speaking of that we become addicted to. We become addicted to the feelings that it gives us. And those feelings are supressed, we stick them somewhere deep down in our pockets next to the dollars that we plan to throw at the nude bodies that themselves, have mouths to feed or perhaps tuition to pay.
Don't allow desired feelings of the flesh define or validate what you mean to you. And damn sure don't allow any movie, club, site, whatever, to make you lose you and the people you love.
Enjoy your bodies and the bodies of those worthy of you when the time and purpose is right. This way, the adventures in your bedroom (with or without that special someone) can be comfortably pleasurable, not shamefully embarrassing.
Love,
Vee
Tuesday, March 1, 2011
I Used to LOVE Her: EXCLUSIVE Event Coverage with COMMON
Words that come to mind when I think of Common: Sexy, Intelligent, Eloquent, Successful, Hip Hop, Black, Sexy…okay, okay maybe that “Sexy” one comes to mind a little more than the others. However, none of those words are good enough. None of them quite capture the raw talent behind the man. Ain't too much common about him. Quite the extraordinary actually.
I caught Common (formerly known as Common Sense) a few weeks ago at Chicago’s Field Museum during his tour from city to city for AT&T’s 28 Days Speaker Series in honor of Black History Month. Common spoke with Kevin Powell, writer, public speaker and activist.
Common, product of the Chi, stands for so much in our community and I was very humbled to be in his presence. His love for Chi City and hip hop is as deep as mine. And as he shared that love, I worked hard to share that moment, with you…
Common first hit the scenes with his debut album “Can I Borrow a Dollar?” in ’92. And when we loaned him that dollar, he gave us some common sense in return. He then released his second album, Like Water for Chocolate, his first major album. Then in 2003, he and Erykah Badu made us fall back in love with hip hop in their ode to hip hop with the track “Love of My Life”, featured in the motion picture Brown Sugar. Both the song and movie are in my personal top ten. Then Common showed his Chi city ass again only a few years later when he dropped his Grammy nominated album Be. And just when he taught us to “just be”, he hit us with another album, his latest released in 2007 titled Finding Forever.
Common to me is a face of hip hop. The beats, the lyrics, the struggles, the pride. He is hip hop then, now and later on, too. Straight from the streets of Chi City, I breathe his dream when I walk down the broken boulevards and assed out avenues.
And he made it out...without selling out.
“You all know my quest as an artist, you all know my mission,” said Common. “But I must admit there are a lot of artist out there that may not be saying things that are uplifting. They may not present things that have any positive energy throughout the whole project.”
I couldn’t help but think of the many rap lyrics that I would spit to that, in reality, disrespected my royalty as a black woman. Or recite some of the lines in a hip hop song that hurts the souls and beings of the men I'm supposed to stand strongly behind. And as those thoughts checked me, Common presented a challenge.
“I challenge the listeners to not support what you don’t want to hear."
Tough challenge, however, Common is no stranger to challenges. Once he conquered the mic, he challenged himself on the big screen with films including American Gangster, Smokin’ Aces and his latest with Queen Latifah, Just Wright.
Common’s outlook on hip hop and our love or hate for it remains positive. His heart beats for hip hop like the lil drummer boy who beats on his white bucket on the side of the 290. And his love for hip hop spreads from heart to heart, and it forever lives in mine.
I love you Common, for what you mean to hip hop and my city and what you’ve taught me about both. Chi City.
Love,
Vee
I caught Common (formerly known as Common Sense) a few weeks ago at Chicago’s Field Museum during his tour from city to city for AT&T’s 28 Days Speaker Series in honor of Black History Month. Common spoke with Kevin Powell, writer, public speaker and activist.
Common, product of the Chi, stands for so much in our community and I was very humbled to be in his presence. His love for Chi City and hip hop is as deep as mine. And as he shared that love, I worked hard to share that moment, with you…
Common first hit the scenes with his debut album “Can I Borrow a Dollar?” in ’92. And when we loaned him that dollar, he gave us some common sense in return. He then released his second album, Like Water for Chocolate, his first major album. Then in 2003, he and Erykah Badu made us fall back in love with hip hop in their ode to hip hop with the track “Love of My Life”, featured in the motion picture Brown Sugar. Both the song and movie are in my personal top ten. Then Common showed his Chi city ass again only a few years later when he dropped his Grammy nominated album Be. And just when he taught us to “just be”, he hit us with another album, his latest released in 2007 titled Finding Forever.
Common to me is a face of hip hop. The beats, the lyrics, the struggles, the pride. He is hip hop then, now and later on, too. Straight from the streets of Chi City, I breathe his dream when I walk down the broken boulevards and assed out avenues.
And he made it out...without selling out.
“You all know my quest as an artist, you all know my mission,” said Common. “But I must admit there are a lot of artist out there that may not be saying things that are uplifting. They may not present things that have any positive energy throughout the whole project.”
I couldn’t help but think of the many rap lyrics that I would spit to that, in reality, disrespected my royalty as a black woman. Or recite some of the lines in a hip hop song that hurts the souls and beings of the men I'm supposed to stand strongly behind. And as those thoughts checked me, Common presented a challenge.
“I challenge the listeners to not support what you don’t want to hear."
Tough challenge, however, Common is no stranger to challenges. Once he conquered the mic, he challenged himself on the big screen with films including American Gangster, Smokin’ Aces and his latest with Queen Latifah, Just Wright.
Common’s outlook on hip hop and our love or hate for it remains positive. His heart beats for hip hop like the lil drummer boy who beats on his white bucket on the side of the 290. And his love for hip hop spreads from heart to heart, and it forever lives in mine.
I love you Common, for what you mean to hip hop and my city and what you’ve taught me about both. Chi City.
Love,
Vee
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